This Christmas, Consider Giving This Most Generous Gift

Photo by Mvltcelik

at no cost to you.

It’s been given throughout the ages to soothe achy souls and mend strained relationships. No other gift feels quite as fulfilling. It can be given to both ourselves and others.

This pandemic has led many of us to be financially strapped so you may be going easy on the presents this year. Don’t feel guilty about that. Most Americans own too much stuff! Stuff is everywhere! Stuff is what we want to get rid of at the start of a new year! 

Consider giving something even more meaningful and from the core of who you are: your presence.

It doesn’t even need to be offered in-person if you’re practicing social distancing. When you’re on the phone with a friend, set aside your social media apps and truly pay attention to what she’s sharing. Let her share what’s on her heart for as long as she wants to. Ask questions. Reflect back to her what she’s saying. Try not to interrupt her, even if her story reminds you of the exact same thing that happened to you and you want to ricochet off into your own spiel. 

When you’re playing with your kids, play with your kids, who are young for just a short while (I promise!). If you’re like me, your immediate impulse is to grab your phone to text, swipe, read, check, write…

Gently set aside that impulse and return to the present moment. Like a kid blowing away the wispy parts of a dandelion, blow away the thoughts that want to rescue you from what feels like the most tedious activity, putting one block on top of another. 

Yes, playing with kids is tedious…and magical when you disappear into the now. It doesn’t need to be for long. Friend and parenting coach Lisa Howe, suggests that parents engaging with their kids for just 15 minutes of uninterrupted child-led play daily can ease children’s anxiety, anger, and neediness.

When you’re on your own and you catch yourself feeling raw emotions, be present to them instead of distract yourself with another activity. Let yourself feel whatever comes up: grief, sadness, longing, giddiness. Ask yourself questions in the same way a loving best friend would: What brings you here? How can I be there for you? What do you need from me?

In my “Find God in Your Life” class, I noticed that every single person experiences God differently. Still, one thing remains universal. We only notice God when we are fully present to an experience; not wishing we were somewhere else, doing something else, or with someone else. 

In this way, even the most mundane activity of peeling potatoes, can feel like an encounter with the sacred. 

Try it. And see for yourself.